David’s Heart

Grab your tissues, this one gets personal-

There are so many things in this world that I may never understand.  Sad things, beautiful things, miracles. Today I’m going to share with you, a miracle – some love, and a bit of awe.

You may not know it but on June 13th, I lost my Uncle to cancer.
Fuck Cancer, I had said. My heart was full of anger and frustration.  They say when you have Leukemia, it’s not the cancer that kills you, it’s the infections.  He had pneumonia.  My uncle David was a fighter, and honestly, saying he was a fighter isn’t nearly enough to justify what a strong person he was. He is.
They told me his heart couldn’t take it. They said his heart failed.
But that’s not David.

David wouldn’t have given in.  I didn’t believe it.  I listened to people share memories at his funeral… and I still didn’t believe he’d given up. David wouldn’t give up. That’s not the kind of person he is.  I sat, in total denial, the entire time. As I pieced together the photos that would make up his slideshow video, I was numb.  It wasn’t real, just a dream. A nightmare. I’d wake up. It went on and on, eventually I cried.  I hated seeing so many people in pain, and there I felt, numb.  – No, correct that, I felt terrible. I watched Deanne (his wife, my aunt) from afar, I played with Hanna and Ava and we tried to pretend like nothing had changed. Like it was a dream.

I don’t know what happens when people die.

I don’t think they do- I know they don’t, I think people, are like dreams, they never die…. they simply forget.

Today, my Mom and I were slicing watermelon, and seemingly out of nowhere, a perfect heart falls from inside the half that my Mom had yet to cut.

it’s David” I immediately say.  I don’t know what brought me to think that, but somehow I knew.

Later that night, we (well, okay, my Mom) got a phone call from Deanne…

“There was a reflection of a heart on our ceiling,” she’d said. “They searched and searched and could not find the source of where it could be coming from!  I called the girls over (Hanna and Ava) and showed them the heart… ‘It’s Daddy’ I said”

David’s heart never stopped beating.
If not in a reflection, or a watermelon… it’s still beating in us. Reminding us never to give up, and listen to your heart.

thank you and love you all.

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