every day I wake up at six. Why? no reason. My brain just wakes me up at six. Like clockwork. I don’t know why I wake, but I do. This didn’t used to happen at home. It used to fluctuate but for some reason, it makes me happy waking up and looking over to my clock. Six O’Clock. For no reason.
I forgot where I was going with this post. I am halfway through a snarkily written “letter to my professor” it should be interesting. It’s fun reading while I’m bored writing it. I don’t really want to write a page “on me” I mean, have you seen my about page? It’s completely awful! … and a whole page of THAT. well. This should be interesting.
I have to find somebody I can confide in. Who I can scream at and they can scream back at me. It’s not the same over the phone. Billy and Sara won’t scream at me over the phone. And I don’t want to scream at them. It’s a Nicole thing. I have a lot to say, a lot on my mind but it’s buried deep. I don’t talk about it unless I trust you to that extent. I guess. I have some issues. You know. Well, not really.
I feel like I’ve spent ten percent of my time here missing my camera. I miss my SLR, I miss having good quality, well edited pictures on my blog. I just miss it all. A lot. There’s a kid I’m friends with named Yohance who brought his SLR. Makes me wish I had mine even more. Like no joke, it’s been sitting, untouched on the back of my closet door in it’s lovely little case. Instagramin’ all of my pictures. Like a loser. (Instagram is wonderful, I just miss my SLR A TON)
I went home this past weekend. It was kind of pitiful. Transitioning quickly between that and college is tough. I want one or the other, not both. It’s like a battle between freedom and being stuck. Or something… I’ve got English tomorrow and my Univ class and I *need* to read two books, but I *really* would rather not. But I’m going to. After I publish this.
anyways. I miss my family, friends, and everyone… but I’m really enjoying my time here. I love it. The freedom, the air, the constant joy. The schoolwork, being responsible for *just me* … it’s all so lovely. I think my plan is to go out for Intermural soccer and get an on campus job. I need one, badly.
anyways, thanks as always for reading. I best be off and start working on schoolwork!